Love yourself more to hate less.

 "Hate. It has caused a lot of problems in the world, but has not solved one yet." Maya Angelou

When I first went to therapy, Meredith (my therapist) would talk to me about loving and showing compassion to myself. For 2 years I struggled with this, struggled with the thought that I might become a narcissist, that I would get lost in being compassionate to myself that I wouldn't have any for anyone else. Meredith repeatedly reassured me that I would have even more love and compassion than I currently had. About a year ago, I started to really make steps to show myself compassion and love. I allowed myself space to be sad and then space to be angry, which lead to an understanding that my past cannot be changed, AND then I showered myself with confidence that I did everything as best as I could and that was enough. I didn't have to question myself and my actions anymore. And when I realized that, if you can believe it, my compassion and love grew. I felt the hate start to pour out of my body. I felt sad for those I had once been disappointed in, sad for those I once was angry with, I no longer felt hatred for them. I felt a greater sense of love and compassion for them than I had ever had before.

Meredith was right all along, a when I stop hating myself, my hate will disappear. When I show myself compassion, my compassion grew.

My love and compassion has grown larger than I could have ever imagined. My heart has become more open and free than ever before.

With this post, I encourage you, when you are feeling anything other than love and compassion for someone, to look inward and try to find out what needs compassion and/or love inside of you. Loving and showing compassion to yourself is the first step to reducing hate.

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